I had to make it to the gym in less than 15 minutes or I would likely have to wait for a treadmill. And miracle of all miracles, I didn't have to wait for a SINGLE light. All the crosswalks said GO the entire way.
By the time I reached the gym, I realized I only had 35 minutes to run 4 miles. Because I really NEEDED to leave the gym by 6:00 PM to make it to 6:15 PM yoga. Done. It's so wonerful that my lungs and legs are becoming so dependable.
Now, if only my brain would follow suit.
31-11-27. No.
31-27-11. Nope.
37-11-21. Not quite.
31-07-11. SHIT.
31-11-07. Not so much.
37-11-27. WHAT THE HELL?
37-07-11. Are you EFFING kidding me?
Angry-Bitter-Frustrated? Yes. Hell yes.
The jumbling of numbers that could possibly constitute the winning combination went on for almost ten minutes. And as the minutes ticked on, the more aggravated I was getting. Do you know how impossible it is for me to block out the obsessive-compulsive computatory mathematical calculations my brain INSISTS on performing in these situations?
Nic's Brain: How many different combinations involve 31, 11, and 27? That's easy - 6! ...Yeah, but what if 31, 11, and 27 aren't the numbers? ... Well I know 31 is in there... Or do I? ...Well, I'm 100% sure that of the follwing five numbers - 31, 01, 07, 11, and 27 - some combination of three will work... FUCK! That's 5 choose 3! I'm going to be here FOREVER.
How do you compete with that?
From what I can tell, the only way to go is balls out. Demand that the quasi-photographic memory of yours kick in and help out. Overpower the permutations! Picture that little sticky tab that was on the back of your lock. No, don't cry, just picture it.
31... 01... I win!
Finally. But not in time to make it to yoga. I have to admit, sometimes I'm not sure Nic + Nic's Brain is a Winning Combination. I drudged home, wondering why the hell Brain INSISTS on performing permutations against the will of my conscious mind. And why Brain so readily lets go of the combination to a lock I've been using almost daily for the past three months, and had opened 35 minutes earlier that day.
Stopped at a light, I kept hearing Brain tinker... 10-36-14... 10-36-14... 10-36-14... Oh, that's rich. Brain remembers the combination to my seventh grade locker.
Sometimes, I guess you just can't win.
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7 comments:
I had a mental picture of you talking to your brain like Homer Simpson does to his.
OMG--you poor thing. I have totally done that before. For me, I couldn't remember my student ID number so that I could log into my online class for a test.
hah. nice.
i still remember my home number when i was 8...
My pea brain cant handle that!
Dad says ... Dad knows the answer and it has something to do with 2/22 ... Early Alzhiemer's is kicking in -- I think it may be genetic ... ah, now, what I was I going to type next????? Love as always ... and especially on 2/22 ... Dad
that happens to me ALL the time. I actually just read about a new combo lock that has letters! Now that's perfect!
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